Avoid Social Networking

The district office HR representative explains to us at the staff meeting, "From now on, teachers must avoid any site that allows for social networking with students."

"I can't believe this," Ms. Jackson says.  "I . . . I've volunteered in my church's youth group for years.  It seems that the best way to model appropriate adult behavior is to interact with kids and be a positive role model."

"No can do, Action Jackson! Churches can have creeps.  Do we want you to seem like a creep?"

"What about the grocery store?  I run into students at the grocery store all the time.  It can be a real network of social interaction."

"Nope.  You can be on the site, but you can't greet students. Just avoid eye contact and pretend that they don't exist."

"I coach baseball."

"Is it the school's team?"

"No."

"Then, you'll need to resign immediately."

"I'm a family friend of one of my students.  Her whole family has been over for dinner."

"That might be misconstrued as a date.  Just tell her family that you cannot be friends with them until their daughter is in college."

"But she's in the fourth grade!"

"Well, they'll have to take a rain check, then.  Any more questions?"

"Can it be an anti-social networking site?  I mean, can I go to a riot where my students might be attending? To me, that's pretty anti-social," I add.

"Good point.  We might need to revisit that.  Let's go to the Board with this.  Perhaps we'll simply pass a rule that you cannot interact with a student at all outside of school."

12 comments:

  1. Awesome. I needed a laugh like the one I just had here.
    ;)

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  2. Haha! That's good stuff. It's a shame that satire is based on reality, because I think many, many teachers have been there.

    - @newfirewithin

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  3. I love this one too. The analogies are well made. I'm sitting here at the staffroom table over lunch conversation wishing I could share this with the rest of the room. Nobody wants to hear me read I guess. This will be a good one to email to my colleagues though.

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  4. BEAUTIFUL. Nuff said.

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  5. Good god, man. SO true. Pretty sure you were sitting in on my latest district-led meeting.

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  6. I have had teachers in high school with Facebook accounts, and it has been a big help. It is an easy way to get in touch with them and ask for help when needed. I think social networking sites are a great tool for the classroom.

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  7. Hilarious. Sad. And all too realistic!

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  8. Hi,
    I am a student in Dr. Strange's EDM310 class. I find that funny and a little extreme. I do think teachers and students should talk outside the classroom but in a professional way. You can find my other comments at http://pittmanbrittanyedm310.blogspot.com/

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  9. Hi,
    My name is Alexandra Maniaci and I'm a student in Dr. Strange's EDM 310 class at the University of South Alabama. This was an entertaining post and I enjoyed reading it! I think social networking sites can be very useful for classes. It is a great way for students to contact teachers. They can ask questions and get help with assignments without having to actually be on school grounds. It is a ridiculous proposition that teachers shouldn’t be allowed to interact with their students outside of school. You can read my comment on your post at http://maniacialexandraedm310.blogspot.com/.

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  10. This is beyond exterme. I think that social networking between teachers and students are fine as long as the interaction is in a positive way. Students should be able to communicate with their teachers outside the classroom walls.

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